Log in

Previous Entry | Next Entry

Kalem Bae/Baekalemed, properish nouns: So this is the first in what I'm hoping will be some notes on the premarital experience. No not that premarital experience*; the road to marriage, which I don't know that I ever really thought I'd be treading, and which I have technically been navigating since February of last year, when Bean and I got engaged. But we didn't actually start making decisions till about eight months after that, and then didn't start any kind of real planning until the start of this year. And now we're eight weeks out from the event. EIGHT WEEKS. What a long, preposterous, stressful, bountiful trip it's been.

One of the first conversations Bean and I had after I proposed--long before any moiling and toiling truly began a-boiling--was whether or not I would take his name. Or rather, whether he would take MY name, as I've long said that, should I marry, I would only take my partner's name if my partner took mine. Since I've published quite a bit under my own name, I would just want to add his name onto the end of mine, so "Stefanie Kalem" would still be searchable. Also so that my name could sound like a nice place to visit: Stefanie Kalem Bae. Lovely. Let's rent a house on the beach.**

Gene Bae Kalem, on the other hand, didn't sit well with my young man. "How about if we combine them?" he suggested. I immediately took a shine to "Baekalem," pronounced like something you'd have done to you--bewitched, bewildered, and baekalemed. He preferred the stress on the first part of the word, so that it sounds like a relative of Bakelite. Such an old-worlder, my young man.

In the end, we decided to remain separate but equal--as with so many other things in our life, we agreed to disagree, and moved on.

Coming soon: Wooden ducks, armpit stains, and the money table.

*Which I have already been writing about, one level or another (and another, and another), for some twenty years now.

**Bean's dad's name is Moon, which means that Bean himself is already half Moon Bae.


( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
Aug. 16th, 2010 05:44 pm (UTC)
( 1 comment — Leave a comment )


hearts n fannys
fancy maybe

Latest Month

August 2010
Powered by LiveJournal.com
Designed by Terri McAllister